The Twilight Saga 2: New Moon Chapter 3 THE END

I FELT perfectly HIDEOUS IN THE MORNING. I HADNT slept well my weapon burned and my level ached. It didnt help my expose consider that Edwards face was tranquil and remote as he kissed my fore show quickly and ducked bug proscribed my window. I was afraid of the magazine Id sp sack unconscious, afraid that he might select been thought or so(predicate) decently and impose on _or_ oppress again term he watched me sleep. The anxiety s spike heelched to ratchet up the inten sety of the pounding in my flip.Edward was waiting for me at school, as usual, much(prenominal) than e trulyw here(predicate) his face was lock wrong. Thither was some matter buried in his look that I couldnt be sure ofand it scargond me. I didnt regard to bring up eventually night, merely I wasnt sure if avoiding the subject would be worse.He receptive my entry for me.How do you aroma?Perfect, I lied, cringing as the sound of the slamming inlet echoed in my head.We walked in hush, he deadening his footprint to match mine. in that respect were so m some(prenominal) questions I fateed to guard, only when most of those questions would have to wait, beca physical exercise chey were for Alice How was Jasper this morning? What had they express when I was at peace(p)? What had Rosalie express? And most importantly, what could she see happening directly in her unusual, imperfect visions of the prospective? Could she guess what Edward was have in minding, why he was so gloomy? Was in that location a foundation for the tenuous, instinctive fears that I couldnt seem to shake?The morning passed slowly. I was impatient to see Alice, though I wouldnt be able to real talk to her with Edward in that respect. Edward remained aloof. Occasion e rattlingy he would ask astir(predicate) my lace, and I would lie.Alice unremarkably beat us to lunch she didnt have to keep pace with a sloth wish well me. only she wasnt at the table, waiting with a tray of nutrime nt she wouldnt eat.Edward didnt articulate anything rough her absence. I wondered to myself if her class was conkning lateuntil I axiom Conner and Ben, who were in her fourth hour French class.Wheres Alice? I asked Edward anxiously.He looked at the granola bar he was slowly pulverizing between his fingertips while he answered. Shes with Jasper.Is he okay?Hes gone a flair for a while.What? Where?Edward shrugged. Nowhere in particular.And Alice, too, I utter with quiet desperation. Of course, if Jasper needed her, she would go.Yes. Shell be gone for a while. She was nerve-wracking to convince him to go to Denali.Denali was where the one another(prenominal) band of unique vampires satisfactory ones desire the Cullenslived. Tanya andher family. Id perceive of them instantaneously and again. Edward had run to them snuff it winter when my arrival had pip Forks difficult for him. Laurent, the most civilized member of Jamess little coven, had gone there rather than siding with James against the Cullens. It make nose expose for Alice to encourage Jasper to go there.I swallowed, try to dislodge the sudden lump in my throat. The wickedness made my head bow and my shoulders slump. Id run them disclose of their home, just alike Rosalie and Emmett. I was a plague.Is your arm bothering you? he asked solicitously.Who c atomic number 18s virtually my stupid arm? I muttered in disgust.He didnt answer, and I impersonate my head wipe out on the table.By the end of the day, the silence was be flood tide ridiculous. I didnt motive to be the one to break it, entirely apparently that was my only resource if I ever cute him to talk to me again.Youll make e very grade ulterior tonight? I asked as he walked mesilentlyto my truck. He al trends came all everyplace. afterwards?It pleased me that he seemed surprised. I have to mould. I had to trade with Mrs. northward to accept yesterday by-key.Oh, he murmured.So youll incur over when Im home, though, mighty? I hated that I matte suddenly unsure or so this.If you deprivation me to.I always pauperization you, I reminded him, with perhaps a little more intensity than the conversation required.I expected he would laugh, or smile, or react somehow to my words.All right, thus, he said indifferently.He kissed my forehead again in the graduation place he shut the doorstep on me. Then he turned his screening and loped grace profusey toward his car.I was able to drive out of the parking lot in front the dread very hit, entirely I was hyperventilating by the time I got to Newtons.He just needed time, I told myself. He would get over this. possibly he was sad because his family was disappearing. simply Alice and Jasper would come back soon, and Rosalie and Emmett, too. If it would help, I would appease away from the big white hearthstone on the riverId never effect foot there again. That didnt matter. Id sedate see Alice at school. She would have to come back for school , right? And she was at my seat all the time anyway. She wouldnt compliments to digest Charlies tactual sensationings by tour of dutying away.No doubt I would as well as run into Carlisle with regularityin the emergency room.After all, what had happened last night was nonhing. zero point had happened. So I fell trimthat was the story of my demeanor. Compared to last spring, it seemed especially unimportant. James had left me busted and nearly dead from loss of bloodand heretofore Edward had knock overled the interminable weeks in the infirmary very ofttimes cave in than this. Was it because, this time, it wasnt an enemy hed had to protect me from? Because it was his brother? possibly it would be better if he took me away, rather than his family being scattered. I grew s light slight depressed as I considered all the uninterrupted completely time. If he could just last done the school year, Charlie wouldnt be able to object. We could go away to college, or pretend thats what we were doing, like Rosalie and Emmett this year. Surely Edward could wait a year. What was a year to an immortal? It didnt eve seem like that much to me.I was able to talk myself into enough composure to handle get out of the truck and walking to the store. microphone Newton had beaten me here straightaway, and he smiled and waved when I came in. I grabbed my vest, nodding mistily in his direction. I was equable imagining pleasant scenarios that consisted of me running away with Edward to various exotic locales. mike interrupted my fantasy. How was your birthday?Ugh, I mumbled. Im glad its over.Mike looked at me from the corners of his eye like I was crazy.Work dragged. I wanted to see Edward again, praying that he would be past the worst of this, whatever it was exactly, by the time I mottoing machine him again. Its nothing, I told myself over and over again. Everything will go back to mean(prenominal).The relief I felt when I turned onto my street and adage Edw ards silver car parked in seem of my house was an overwhelming, impudent thing. And it bothered me profoundlyly that it should be that way.I go with the bird-scarer door, covering out in the lead I was completely in spite of appearance.Dad? Edward?As I spoke, I could hear the distinctive theme music from ESPNs SportsCenter coming from the life room.In here, Charlie called.I hung my rain downcoat on its peg and hurried around the corner.Edward was in the armchair, my father on the sofa. Both had their eye develop on the TV. The reduce was normal for my father. Not so much for Edward.Hi, I said weakly.Hey, Bella, my father answered, look never moving. We just had cold pizza. I appreciate its til now on the table.Okay.I waited in the doorway. Finally, Edward looked over at me with a polite smile. Ill be right behind you, he promised. His eye strayed back to the TV.I stared for another minute, shocked. Neither one seemed to notice. I could feel something, dismay maybe, building up in my chest. I escaped to the kitchen.The pizza held no interest for me. I sat in my chair, pulled my knees up, and wrapped my arm around them. Something was very wrong, maybe more wrong than Id realize. The sounds of male hold fast and banter continued from the TV set.I act to get ascendance of myself, to reason with myself.Whats the worst that can happen? I flinched. That was definitely the wrong question to ask. I was having a hard time breathing right.Okay, I thought again, whats the worst I can live through? I didnt like that question so much, either. hardly I thought through the possibilities Id considered today.Staying away from Edwards family. Of course, he wouldnt expect Alice to be part of that. precisely if Jasper was wrap up limits, that would lessen the time I could have with her. I nodded to myselfI could live with that.Or going away. Maybe he wouldnt want to wait till the end of the school year, maybe it would have to be now.In front of me, on the table, my presents from Charlie and Renee were where I had left them, the television camera I hadnt had the seize on place to use at the Cullens sitting beside the album. I stirred the pretty cover of the scrapbook my mother had minded(p) me, and sighed, thinking of Renee. Somehow, living without her for as dogged as I had did not make the idea of a more permanent separation easier. And Charlie would be left all alone here, abandoned. They would both be so hurtBut wed come back, right? Wed visit, of course, wouldnt we?I couldnt be certain about the answer to that.I leaned my cheek against my knee, staring at the physical tokens of my parents love. Id sock this path Id chosen was going to be hard. And, after all, I was thinking about the worst-case scenariothe very worst I could live through.I touched the scrapbook again, flipping the front cover over. Little metal corners were already in place to hold the first insure. It wasnt a fractional-bad idea, to make some exhibit o f my life here. I felt a unusual urge to get started. Maybe I didnt have that dour left in Forks.I toyed with the wrist strap on the camera, wondering about the first image on the roll. Could it possibly turn out anything close to the original? I doubted it. But he didnt seem worried that it would be blank. I chuckled to myself, thinking of his harum-scarum laughter last night. The chuckle died away. So much had changed, and so abruptly. It made me feel a little bit dizzy, like I was stand up on an edge, a precipice somewhere much too high.I didnt want to think about that anymore. I grabbed the camera and headed up the stairs.My room hadnt really changed all that much in the seventeen years since my mother had been here. The walls were still light blue, the said(prenominal) yellowed lace curtains hung in front of the window. thither was a bed, rather than a crib, but she would recognize the quilt clothed untidily over the topit had been a gift ROM Gran.Regardless, I snapped a picture of my room. There wasnt much else I could do tonightit was too isolated awayand the feeling was growing stronger, it was almost a compulsion now. I would record everything about Forks onward I had to leave it.Change was coming. I could feel it. It wasnt a pleasant prospect, not when life was perfect the way it was.I took my time coming back down the stairs, camera in hand, trying to ignore the butterflies in mystomach as I thought of the strange distance I didnt want to see in Edwards eye. He would get over this. Probably he was worried that I would be demented when he asked me to leave. I would let him work through it without meddling. And I would be prepared when he asked.I had the camera ready as I leaned around the corner, being sneaky. I was sure there was no feel that I had caught Edward by surprise, but he didnt look up. I felt a brief shiver as something wintery twisted in my stomach I ignored that and took the picture.They both looked at me hence. Charlie fr owned. Edwards face was empty, mental synthesisless.What are you doing, Bella? Charlie complained.Oh, come on. I pretended to smile as I went to sit on the offend in front of the sofa where Charlie lounged. You know mamma will be duty soon to ask if Im using my presents. I have to get to work before she can get her feelings hurt.why are you taking pictures of me, though? he grumbled.Because youre so workforceome, I replied, care it light. And because, since you bought the camera, youre obligated to be one of my subjects.He mumbled something unintelligible.Hey, Edward, I said with admirable indifference. Take one of me and my dad together.I threw the camera toward him, carefully avoiding his eyes, and knelt beside the arm of the sofa where Charlies face was. Charlie sighed.You need to smile, Bella, Edward murmured.I did my best, and the camera flashed.Let me take one of you kids, Charlie suggested. I k unsanded he was just trying to shift the cameras focus fromhimself.Edward st ood and lightly tossed him the camera.I went to stand beside Edward, and the arrangement felt formal and strange to me. He put one hand lightly on my shoulder, and I wrapped my arm more securely around his waist. I wanted to look at his face, but I was afraid to.Smile, Bella, Charlie reminded me again.I took a thick breath and smiled. The flash blinded me.Enough pictures for tonight, Charlie said then, shoving the camera into a crevice of the sofa cushions and rolling over it. You dont have to use the whole roll now.Edward neutralizeped his hand from my shoulder and twisted casually out of my arm. He sat back down in the armchair.I hesitated, and then went to sit against the sofa again. I was suddenly so frightened that my hands were shaking. I pressed them into my stomach to hide them, put my chin on my knees and stared at the TV screen in front of me, seeing nothing.When the arrangement ended, I hadnt moved an inch. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Edward stand.Id better get home, he said.Charlie didnt look up from the commercial. See ya.I got awkwardly to my feetI was stiff from sitting so stilland followed Edward out the front door. He went rightful(a) to his car.Will you stay? I asked, no hope in my role.I expected his answer, so it didnt hurt as much.Not tonight.I didnt ask for a reason.He got in his car and drove away while I stood there, unmoving. I barely noticed that it was raining. I waited, without knowing what I waited for, until the door opened behind me.Bella, what are you doing? Charlie asked, surprised to see me rest there alone and dripping.Nothing. I turned and trudged back to the house.It was a long night, with little in the way of rest.I got up as soon as there was a faint light extraneous my window. I dressed for school mechanically, waiting for the clouds to brighten. When I had eaten a bowl of cereal, I decided that it was light enough for pictures. I took one of my truck, and then the front of the house. I turned and snapped a few of the wood by Charlies house. ludicrous how it didnt seem sinister like it used to. I realized I would miss thisthe green, the timelessness, the mystery of the woods. All of it.I put the camera in my school bag before I left. I tried to digest on my new project rather than the fact that Edward apparently hadnt gotten over things during the night.Along with the fear, I was beginning to feel impatience. How long could this last?It lasted through the morning. He walked silently beside me, never seeming to actually look at me. I tried to concentrate on my classes, but not even English could hold my watchfulness. Mr. Berty had to repeat his question about Lady Capulet in two ways before I realized he was talking to me. Edward whispered the oppose answer downstairs his breath and then went back to ignoring me.At lunch, the silence continued. I felt like I was going to start call at any milliampereent, so, to distract myself, I leaned across the tables invisible force and s poke to Jessica.Hey, Jess?Whats up, Bella?Could you do me a favor? I asked, reaching into my bag. My mom wants me to get some pictures of my friends for a scrapbook. So, take some pictures of everybody, okay?I handed her the camera.Sure, she said, grinning, and turned to snap a candid shot of Mike with his mouth full.A predictable picture war ensued. I watched them hand the camera around the table, giggling and flirting and complaining about being on film. It seemed strangely childish. Maybe I just wasnt in the mood for normal human behavior today.Uh-oh, Jessica said apologetically as she returned the camera. I think we used all your film.Thats okay. I think I already got pictures of everything else I needed.After school, Edward walked me back to the parking lot in silence. I had to work again, and for once, I was glad. Time with me obviously wasnt helping things. Maybe time alone would be better.I dropped my film off at the Thriftway on my way to Newtons, and then picked up the dev eloped pictures after work. At home, I said a brief hi to Charlie, grabbed a granola bar from the kitchen, and hurried up to my room with the envelope of photographs tucked under my arm.I sat in the oculus of my bed and opened the envelope with wary curiosity. Ridiculously, I still half expected the first print to be a blank.When I pulled it out, I gasped aloud. Edward looked just as beautiful as he did in real life, staring at me out of the picture with the fervent eyes Id missed for the past few days. It was almost uncanny that anyone could look so so beyond description. No thousand words could equal this picture.I flipped through the rest of the stack quickly once, and then laid leash of them out on the bed side by side.The first was the picture of Edward in the kitchen, his warm eyes touched with tolerant amusement. The second was Edward and Charlie, notice ESPN. The difference in Edwards expression was severe. His eyes were careful here, reserved. Still breathtakingly beaut iful, but his face was colder, more like a sculpture, less alive.The last was the picture of Edward and me standing awkwardly side by side. Edwards face was the same as the last, cold and statue-like. But that wasnt the most troubling part of this photograph. The contrast between the two of us was painful. He looked like a god. I looked very average, even for a human, almost shamefully plain. I flipped the picture over with a feeling of disgust.Instead of doing my homework, I stayed up to put my pictures into the album. With a ballpoint pen I scrawled captions under all the pictures, the bring ups and the dates. I got to the picture of Edward and me, and, without looking at it too long, I folded it in half and stuck it under the metal tab, Edward-side up.When I was done, I stuffed the second set of prints in a fresh envelope and penned a long thank-you letter to Renee.Edward still hadnt come over. I didnt want to admit that he was the reason Id stayed up so late, but of course he w as. I tried to concoct the last time hed stayed away like this, without an excuse, a phone call He never had.Again, I didnt sleep well.School followed the silent, frustrating, terrifying build of the last two days. I felt relief when I saw Edward waiting for me in the parking lot, but it faded quickly. He was no different, unless maybe more remote.It was hard to even remember the reason for all this mess. My birthday already felt like the distant past. If only Alice would come back. Soon. Before this got any more out of hand.But I couldnt deem on that. I decided that, if I couldnt talk to him today, really talk, then I was going to see Carlisle tomorrow. I had to do something.After school, Edward and I were going to talk it out, I promised myself. I wasnt accepting any excuses.He walked me to my truck, and I steeled myself to make my demands.Do you mind if I come over today? he asked before we got to the truck, beating me to the punch.Of course not.Now? he asked again, opening my door for me.Sure, I kept my spokesperson even, though I didnt like the urgency in his tone. I was just going to drop a letter for Renee in the mailbox on the way. Ill meet you there.He looked at the fat envelope on the passenger seat. Suddenly, he reached over me and snagged it.Ill do it, he said quietly. And Ill still beat you there. He smiled my favourite crooked smile, but it was wrong. It didnt reach his eyes.Okay, I agreed, unable to smile back. He shut the door, and headed toward his car.He did beat me home. He was parked in Charlies tarnish when I pulled up in front of the house. That was a bad sign. He didnt plan to stay, then. I shook my head and took a deep breath, trying to locate some courage.He got out of his car when I tempoped out of the truck, and came to meet me. He reached to take my book bag from me. That was normal. But he shoved it back onto the seat. That was not normal.Come for a walk with me, he suggested in an unemotional join, taking my hand.I didnt a nswer. I couldnt think of a way to protest, but I instantly knew that I wanted to. I didnt like this. This is bad, this is very bad, the voice in my head repeated again and again.But he didnt wait for an answer. He pulled me along toward the east side of the yard, where the lumber encroached. I followed un unforcedly, trying to think through the panic. It was what I wanted, I reminded myself. The chance to talk it all through. So why was the panic choking me?Wed gone only a few steps into the trees when he stop. We were barely on the trailI could still see the house.Some walk.Edward leaned against a tree and stared at me, his expression unreadable.Okay, lets talk, I said. It sounded braver than it felt.He took a deep breath.Bella, were leaving.I took a deep breath, too. This was an acceptable option. I thought I was prepared. But I still had to ask.why now? Another yearBella, its time. How much longer could we stay in Forks, after all? Carlisle can barely pass for thirty, and hes c laiming xxxiii now. Wed have to start over soon regardless.His answer confused me. I thought the point of leaving was to let his family live in peace. Why did we have to leave if they were going? I stared at him, trying to represent what he meant.He stared back coldly.With a roll of nausea, I realized Id misunderstood.When you say we, I whispered.I mean my family and myself. Each word class and distinct.I shook my head back and forth mechanically, trying to pull in it. He waited without any sign of impatience. It took a few minutes before I could speak.Okay, I said. Ill come with you.You cant, Bella. Where were going Its not the right place for you.Where you are is the right place for me.Im no good for you, Bella.Dont be ridiculous. I wanted to sound angry, but it just sounded like I was begging. Youre the very best part of my life.My world is not for you, he said grimly.What happened with Jasperthat was nothing, Edward NothingYoure right, he agreed. It was exactly what was to be expected.You promised In Phoenix, you promised that you would stayAs long as that was best for you, he interrupted to correct me.No This is about my soul, isnt it? I shouted, furious, the words exploding out of mesomehow it still sounded like a plea. Carlisle told me about that, and I dont care, Edward. I dont care You can have my soul. I dont want it without youits yours alreadyHe took a deep breath and stared, unseeingly, at the cause for a long moment. His mouth twisted the tiniest bit. When he finally looked up, his eyes were different, harderlike the liquid gold had frozen solid.Bella, I dont want you to come with me. He spoke the words slowly and precisely, his cold eyes on my face, observation as I absorbed what he was really verbalize.There was a pause as I repeated the words in my head a few times, sifting through them for their real intent.You dont want me? I tried out the words, confused by the way they sounded, placed in that order.No.I stared, uncomprehending, into h is eyes. He stared back without apology. His eyes were like topazhard and suck and very deep. I felt like I could see into them for miles and miles, yet nowhere in rheir bottomlandless depths could I see a contradiction to the word hed spoken.Well, that changes things. I was surprised by how calm and reasonable my voice sounded. It must(prenominal) be because I was so numb. I couldnt realize what he was telling me. It still didnt make any sense.He looked away into the trees as he spoke again. Of course, Ill always love you in a way. But what happened the other night made me realize that its time for a change. Because Im degenerate of pretending to be something Im not, Bella. I am not human. He looked back, and the icy planes of his perfect face were not human. Ive let this go on much too long, and Im sorry for that.Dont. My voice was just a whisper now awareness was beginning to seep through me, trickling like acid through my veins. Dont do this.He just stared at me, and I coul d see from his eyes that my words were far too late. He already had.Youre not good for me, Bella. He turned his earlier words around, and so I had no argument. How well I knew that I wasnt good enough for him.I opened my mouth to say something, and then closed it again. He waited patiently, his face wiped impertinent of all emotion. I tried again.If thats what you want.He nodded once.My whole body went numb. I couldnt feel anything below the neck.I would like to ask one favor, though, if thats not too much, he said.I wonder what he saw on my face, because something flickered across his own face in response. But, before I could lay it, hed composed his features into the same serene mask.Anything, I vowed, my voice faintly stronger.As I watched, his frozen eyes melted. The gold became liquid again, molten, burning down into mine with an intensity that was overwhelming.Dont do anything reckless or stupid, he ordered, no longer detached. Do you understand what Im saying?I nodded helpl essly.His eyes cooled, the distance returned. Im thinking of Charlie, of course. He needs you. Take care of yourselffor him.I nodded again. I will, I whispered.He seemed to relax just a little.And Ill make you a promise in return, he said. I promise that this will be the last time youll see me. I wont come back. I wont put you through anything like this again. You can go on with your life without any more interference from me. It will be as if Id never existed.My knees must have started to shake, because the trees were suddenly wobbling. I could hear the blood pounding windy than normal behind my ears. His voice sounded farther away.He smiled gently. Dont commove. Youre humanyour memory is no more than a sieve. Time heals all wounds for your kind.And your memories? I asked. It sounded like there was something stuck in my throat, like I was choking.Wellhe hesitated for a short secondI wont forget. But my kind were very easily distracted. He smiled the smile was tranquil and it did not touch his eyes.He took a step away from me. Thats everything, I suppose. We wont bother you again.The plural caught my attention. That surprised me I would have thought I was beyond noticing anything.Alice isnt coming back, I realized. I dont know how he heard methe words made no soundbut he seemed to understand.He shook his head slowly, always watching my face.No. Theyre all gone. I staved behind to tell you goodbye.Alice is gone? My voice was blank with disbelief.She wanted to say goodbye, but I convinced her that a clean break would be better for you.I was dizzy it was hard to concentrate. His words swirled around in my head, and I heard the doctor at the hospital in Phoenix, last spring, as he showed me the X-rays. You can see its a clean break, his finger traced along the picture of my severed bone. Thats good. It will heal more easily, more quickly .I tried to breathe normally. I needed to concentrate, to visualise a way out of this nightmare.Goodbye, Bella, he said in th e same quiet, peaceful voice.Wait I choked out the word, reaching for him, willing my deadened legs to carry me forrard.I thought he was reaching for me, too. But his cold hands locked around my wrists and pinned them to my sides. He leaned down, and pressed his lips very lightly to my forehead for the briefest instant. My eyes closed.Take care of yourself, he breathed, cool against my scramble.There was a light, unnatural breeze. My eyes flashed open. The leaves on a scurvy vine maple shuddered with the settle wind of his passage.He was gone.With shaky legs, ignoring the fact that my action was useless, I followed him into the forest. The examine of his path had disappeared instantly. There were no footprints, the leaves were still again, but I walked forward without thinking. I could not do anything else. I had to keep moving. If I stopped looking for him, it was over.Love, life, meaning over.I walked and walked. Time made no sense as I pushed slowly through the thick undergr owth. It was hours passing, but also only seconds. Maybe it felt like time had frozen because the forest looked the same no matter how far I went. I started to worry that I was traveling in a circle, a very small circle at that, but I kept going. I stumbled often, and, as it grew bader and darker, I fell often, too.Finally, I tripped over somethingit was black now, I had no idea what caught my footand I stayed down. I rolled onto my side, so that I could breathe, and curling up on the fuddled bracken.As I lay there, I had a feeling that more time was passing than I realized. I couldnt remember how long it had been since nightfall. Was it always so dark here at night? Surely, as a rule, some little bit of lunar month would filter down through the clouds, through the chinks in the canopy of trees, and reign the ground.Not tonight. Tonight the sky was utterly black. Perhaps there was no moon tonighta lunar eclipse, a new moon.A new moon. I shivered, though I wasnt cold.It was blac k for a long time before I heard them calling.Someone was shouting my name. It was muted, muffled by the wet growth that surrounded me, but it was definitely my name. I didnt recognize the voice. I thought about answering, but I was dazed, and it took a long time to come to the conclusion that I should answer. By then, the calling had stopped.Sometime later, the rain woke me up. I dont think Id really fallen asleep I was just lost in an unthinking stupor, holding with all my strength to the nonchalance that kept me from realizing what I didnt want to know.The rain bothered me a little. It was cold. I unwrapped my munition from around my legs to cover my face.It was then that I heard the calling again. It was farther away this time, and sometimes it sounded like several voices were calling at once. I tried to breathe deeply. I remembered that I should answer, but I didnt think they would be able to hear me. Would I be able to shout loud enough?Suddenly, there was another sound, sta rtlingly close. A kind of snuffling, an animal sound. It sounded big. I wondered if I should feel afraid. I didntjust numb. It didnt matter. The snuffling went away.The rain continued, and I could feel the water pooling up against my cheek. I was trying to gather the strength to turn my head when I saw the light.At first it was just a dim glow reflecting off the bushes in the distance. It grew brighter and brighter, illuminating a large space unlike the focused beam of a flashlight. The light broke through the closest brush, and I could see that it was a propane lantern, but that was all I could seethe ingeniousness blinded me for a moment.Bella.The voice was deep and unfamiliar, but full of recognition. He wasnt calling my name to search, he was acknowledging that I was found.I stared upimpossibly high it seemedat the dark face that I could now see above me. I was vaguely aware that the stranger probably only looked so rangy because my head was still on the ground.Have you been hurt?I knew the words meant something, but I could only stare, bewildered. How could the meaning matter at this point?Bella, my name is surface-to-air missile Uley.There was nothing familiar about his name.Charlie sent me to look for you.Charlie? That struck a chord, and I tried to pay more attention to what he was saying. Charlie mattered, if nothing else did.The tall man held out a hand. I gazed at it, not sure what I was supposed to do.His black eyes appraised me for a second, and then he shrugged. In a quick and lithe notion, he pulled me up from the ground and into his arms.I hung there, limp, as he loped fleetly through the wet forest. Some part of me knew this should upset mebeing carried away by a stranger. But there was nothing left in me to upset.It didnt seem like too much time passed before there were lights and the deep babble of many male voices. Sam Uley slowed as he approached the commotion.Ive got her he called in a booming voice.The babble ceased, and then picked up again with more intensity. A confusing swirl of faces moved over me. Sams voice was the only one that made sense in the chaos, perhaps because my ear was against his chest.No, I dont think shes hurt, he told psyche. She just keeps saying Hes gone. Was I saying that out loud? I bit down on my lip.Bella, honey, are you all right?That was one voice I would know anywhereeven distorted, as it was now, with worry.Charlie? My voice sounded strange and small.Im right here, baby.There was a shifting under me, followed by the leathery smell of my dads sheriff jacket. Charlie staggered under my weight.Maybe I should hold on to her, Sam Uley suggested.Ive got her, Charlie said, a little breathless.He walked slowly, struggling. I wished I could tell him to put me down and let me walk, but I couldnt husking my voice.There were lights everywhere, held by the crowd walking with him. It felt like a parade. Or a funeral procession. I closed my eyes.Were almost home now, honey, Charlie mumbled n ow and then.I opened my eyes again when I heard the door unlock. We were on the porch of our house, and the tall dark man named Sam was holding the door for Charlie, one arm extended toward us, as if he was preparing to catch me when Charlies arms failed.But Charlie managed to get me through the door and to the couch in the living room.Dad, Im all wet, I objected feebly.That doesnt matter. His voice was gruff. And then he was talking to somebody else. Blankets are in the cupboard at the top of the stairs.Bella? a new voice asked. I looked at the gray-haired man leaning over me, and recognition came after a few slow seconds.Dr. Gerandy? I mumbled.Thats right, dear, he said. Are you hurt, Bella?It took me a minute to think that through. I was confused by the memory of Sam Uleys similar question in the woods. Only Sam had asked something else Have you been hurt? hed said. The difference seemed significant somehow.Dr. Gerandy was waiting. One grizzled brow rose, and the wrinkles on his forehead deepened.Im not hurt, I lied. The words, were true enough for what hed asked.His warm hand touched my forehead, and his fingers pressed against the inside of my wrist. I watched his lips as he counted to himself, his eyes on his watch.What happened to you? he asked casually.I froze under his hand, tasting panic in the back of my throat.Did you get lost in the woods? he prodded. I was aware of several other people listening. Three tall men with dark facesfrom La Push, the Quileute Indian reservation down on the coastline, I guessedSam Uley among them, were standing very close together and staring at me. Mr. Newton was there with Mike and Mr. Weber, Angelas father they all were watching me more surreptitiously than the strangers. Other deep voices rumbled from the kitchen and outside the front door. Half the town must have been looking for me.Charlie was the closest. He leaned in to hear my answer.Yes, I whispered. I got lost.The doctor nodded, thoughtful, his fingers probi ng gently against the glands under my jaw. Charlies face hardened.Do you feel tired? Dr. Gerandy asked.I nodded and closed my eyes obediently.I dont think theres anything wrong with her, I heard the doctor mutter to Charlie after a moment. still exhaustion. Let her sleep it off, and Ill come check on her tomorrow, he paused. He must have looked at his watch, because he added, Well, later today actually.There was a creaking sound as they both pushed off from the couch to get to their feet.Is it true? Charlie whispered. Their voices were farther away now. I labour to hear. Did they leave?Dr. Cullen asked us not to say anything, Dr. Gerandy answered. The offer was very sudden they had to choose immediately. Carlisle didnt want to make a big production out of leaving.A little warning might have been nice, Charlie grumbled.Dr. Gerandy sounded uncomfortable when he replied. Yes, well, in this situation, some warning might have been called for.I didnt want to listen anymore. I felt aroun d for the edge of the quilt someone had laid on top of me, and pulled it over my ear.I drifted in and out of alertness. I heard Charlie whisper thanks to the volunteers as, one by one, they left. I felt his fingers on my forehead, and then the weight of another blanket. The phone rang a few times, and he hurried to catch it before it could wake me. He muttered reassurances in a low voice to the callers.Yeah, we found her. Shes okay. She got lost. Shes fine now, he said again and again.I heard the springs in the armchair groan when he settled himself in for the night.A few minutes later, the phone rang again.Charlie moaned as he struggled to his feet, and then he rushed, stumbling, to the kitchen I pulled my head deeper under the blankets, not wanting to listen to the same conversation again.Yeah, Charlie said, and yawned.His voice changed, it was much more alert when he spoke again. Where? There was a pause. Youre sure its outside the reservation? Another short pause. But what could be burning out there? He sounded both worried and mystified. Look, Ill call down there and check it out.I listened with more interest as he punched in a number.Hey, billy goat, its Charliesorry Im calling so early no, shes fine. Shes sleeping Thanks, but thats not why I called. I just got a call from Mrs. Stanley, and she says that from her second-story window she can see fires out on the sea cliffs, but I didnt really Oh Suddenly there was an edge in his voiceirritation or anger. And why are they doing that? Uh huh. Really? He said it sarcastically. Well, dont apologize to me. Yeah, yeah. Just make sure the flames dont spread I know, I know, Im surprised they got them lit at all in this weather.Charlie hesitated, and then added grudgingly. Thanks for sending Sam and the other boys up. You were rightthey do know the forest better than we do. It was Sam who found her, so I owe you one Yeah, Ill talk to you later, he agreed, still sour, before hanging up.Charlie muttered something i ncoherent as he shuffled back to the living room.Whats wrong? I asked.He hurried to my side.Im sorry I woke you, honey.Is something burning?Its nothing, he assured me. Just some bonfires out on the cliffs.Bonfires? I asked. My voice didnt sound curious. It sounded dead.Charlie frowned. Some of the kids from the reservation being rowdy, he explained.Why? I wondered dully.I could tell he didnt want to answer. He looked at the floor under his knees. Theyre celebrating the news. His tone was bitter.There was only one piece of news I could think of, try as I might not to. And then the pieces snapped together. Because the Cullens left, I whispered. They dont like the Cullens in La PushId forgotten about that.The Quileutes had their superstitions about the cold ones, the blood-drinkers that were enemies to their tribe, just like they had their legends of the great flood and wolf-men ancestors. Just stories, folklore, to most of them. Then there were the few that believed. Charlies good fr iend Billy Black believed, though even Jacob, his own son, thought he was full of stupid superstitions. Billy had warned me to stay away from the CullensThe name stirred something inside me, something that began to claw its way toward the surface, something I knew I didnt want to face.Its ridiculous, Charlie spluttered.We sat in silence for a moment. The sky was no longer black outside the window. Somewhere behind the rain, the sun was beginning to rise.Bella? Charlie asked.I looked at him uneasily.He left you alone in the woods? Charlie guessed.I deflected his question. How did you know where to pick up me? My mind shied away from the inevitable awareness that was coming, coming quickly now.Your note, Charlie answered. surprised. He reached into the back pocket of his jeans and pulled out a much-abused piece of paper. It was dirty and damp, with sixfold creases from being opened and refolded many times. He unfolded it again, and held it up as evidence. The mussy handwriting was r emarkably close to my own.Going for a walk with Edward, up the path, it said. Back soon, B.When you didnt come back, I called the Cullens, and no one answered, Charlie said in a low voice. Then I called the hospital, and Dr. Gerandy told me that Carlisle was gone.Where did they go? I mumbled.He stared at me. Didnt Edward tell you?I shook my head, recoiling. The sound of his name unleashed the thing that was clawing inside of meapain that knocked me breathless, astonished me with its force.Charlie eyed me doubtfully as he answered. Carlisle took a job with a big hospital in Los Angeles. I guess they threw a lot of money at him.Sunny L.A. The last place they would really go. I remembered my nightmare with the mirror the bright sunniness shimmering off of his skinAgony ripped through me with the memory of his face.I want to know if Edward left you alone out there in the middle of the woods, Charlie insisted.His name sent another wave of torture through me. I shook my head, frantic, de sperate to escape the pain. It was my fault. He left me right here on the trail, in sight of the house but I tried to follow him.Charlie started to say something childishly, I covered my ears. I cant talk about this anymore, Dad. I want to go to my room.Before he could answer, I go up from the couch and lurched my way up the stairs.Someone had been in the house to leave a note for Charlie, a note that would lead him to check me. From the minute that Id realized this, a horrible suspicion began to grow in my head. I rushed to my room, shutting and locking the door behind me before I ran to the CD player by my bed.Everything looked exactly the same as Id left it. I pressed down on the top of the CD player. The latch unhooked, and the lid slowly swung open.It was empty.The album Renee had given me sat on the floor beside the bed, just where Id put it last. I lifted the cover with a shaking hand.I didnt have to flip any farther than the first page. The little metal corners no longer h eld a picture in place. The page was blank except for my own handwriting scrawled across the bottom Edward Cullen, Charlies kitchen, Sept. 13th.I stopped there. I was sure that he would have been very thorough.It will be as if Id never existed, hed promised me.I felt the smooth wooden floor beneath my knees, and then the palms of my hands, and then it was pressed against the skin of my cheek. I hoped that I was fainting, but, to my disappointment, I didnt lose consciousness. The waves of pain that had only lapped at me before now reared high up and washed over my head, wrench me under.I did not resurface.